Having gone to film school I often refer to movies or quotes. I think of them. I live them. Sometimes I live them to a fault. Other times I provoke thought of those around me. Best of all is when I provoke thought within myself.
High Fidelity came out in 2000, and having been a child of the 80's given that John Cusack is in it; well, it was a no brainer. Now, without going all film-school movie reviewer, I'll only note that Cusack's character is a deep character. I don't say that as in he is super philosophical, that's not the case, more of a soul searcher. Then again, aren't we all? The following quote has always stuck with me since the first viewing of the film:
“What came first – the music or the misery? Did I listen to the music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to the music? Do all those records turn you into a melancholy person?”
As far back as I can remember I was around music. Music is everywhere. Growing up cleaning at home we'd listen to music. In the car, we'd listen to music. It was those instances that broadened my musical knowledge to spat off facts about Styx, REO Speedwagon, Journey, and many other bands that were really 'before my time'.
Junior High brought those mid-90's pop songs that I didn't really like, but the friends of mine that I thought I couldn't live without liked them, so by default I did too. And let me tell you, on the rare occasion I hear Janet Jackson's "Again" I am teleported right back to Ludwig Junior High awkwardly slow dancing ... don't deny it, you know what I'm talking about. The arms straight out, the distance of your arm span between you and your dance partner, swaying, not actually moving.
High School, oh High School. I'm thankful that I was a mid-90's to late 90's High Schooler. Sure, all generations say their music was the best. But really the alternative and grunge scene, it was the best. Do I feel old and taken aback when I hear songs I thought were my personal anthem in High School on the 'Classic Rock' station? No, not exactly. I feel confused though. Very confused.
It was in College my music tastes changed. I'm thankful for that time. I learned of music that was out there, but no one knew of. That 'indie' scene as it was called, I still search it often. I find some of the best stuff out there. The stuff where people are trying, they are working toward their goals, and if one person hears it; then they've made progress.
Am I saying I listen to Janet Jackson's "Again" often? Nope, never. And it's pretty rare to hear it on the radio or in passing at a store. What has happened is I find myself going back to that alternative and grunge scene that was so familiar to me. It's still familiar to me, there's just different bands in rotation on radio stations and on playlists. I'm not certain why I gravitate to music from almost 20 years ago now. I wonder at times if it's because it's familiar, because I know the words, I like the power behind it. Or I wonder if it's something deeper, something where new confident me is going down memory lane and thanking the younger version of myself for helping the newer version of myself out.
As my training goes on and my workouts get longer and more intense, I find myself adding to my playlists. What is surprising to me is the amount of influence songs I hear in classes are having on my lists. So much so that when I hear some newer pop(ish) songs in passing or in a store I am immediately teleported to a mental run or bike ride. In fact, there are some songs now I only equate to training. In addition I find myself listening to songs and thinking "This has a good cadence to it, I could run to it." And so I do.
Music nearly by definition evokes memories. Some of those memories evoke misery. But sorting them out is the difficult part. So I get upset when I heard "Again" by Janet Jackson? No, I laugh though. I laugh because at that time of my life those friends I had, I thought were life long. Forever. Reality is, they weren't, and that's ok. They were momentary. I laugh because much like other choices in both friends and music I've made; not all last. What does last is the memories. And the memories don't have to define me, they don't have to make me miserable. If anything now, the music only motivates me.
High Fidelity came out in 2000, and having been a child of the 80's given that John Cusack is in it; well, it was a no brainer. Now, without going all film-school movie reviewer, I'll only note that Cusack's character is a deep character. I don't say that as in he is super philosophical, that's not the case, more of a soul searcher. Then again, aren't we all? The following quote has always stuck with me since the first viewing of the film:
“What came first – the music or the misery? Did I listen to the music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to the music? Do all those records turn you into a melancholy person?”
As far back as I can remember I was around music. Music is everywhere. Growing up cleaning at home we'd listen to music. In the car, we'd listen to music. It was those instances that broadened my musical knowledge to spat off facts about Styx, REO Speedwagon, Journey, and many other bands that were really 'before my time'.
Junior High brought those mid-90's pop songs that I didn't really like, but the friends of mine that I thought I couldn't live without liked them, so by default I did too. And let me tell you, on the rare occasion I hear Janet Jackson's "Again" I am teleported right back to Ludwig Junior High awkwardly slow dancing ... don't deny it, you know what I'm talking about. The arms straight out, the distance of your arm span between you and your dance partner, swaying, not actually moving.
High School, oh High School. I'm thankful that I was a mid-90's to late 90's High Schooler. Sure, all generations say their music was the best. But really the alternative and grunge scene, it was the best. Do I feel old and taken aback when I hear songs I thought were my personal anthem in High School on the 'Classic Rock' station? No, not exactly. I feel confused though. Very confused.
It was in College my music tastes changed. I'm thankful for that time. I learned of music that was out there, but no one knew of. That 'indie' scene as it was called, I still search it often. I find some of the best stuff out there. The stuff where people are trying, they are working toward their goals, and if one person hears it; then they've made progress.
Am I saying I listen to Janet Jackson's "Again" often? Nope, never. And it's pretty rare to hear it on the radio or in passing at a store. What has happened is I find myself going back to that alternative and grunge scene that was so familiar to me. It's still familiar to me, there's just different bands in rotation on radio stations and on playlists. I'm not certain why I gravitate to music from almost 20 years ago now. I wonder at times if it's because it's familiar, because I know the words, I like the power behind it. Or I wonder if it's something deeper, something where new confident me is going down memory lane and thanking the younger version of myself for helping the newer version of myself out.
As my training goes on and my workouts get longer and more intense, I find myself adding to my playlists. What is surprising to me is the amount of influence songs I hear in classes are having on my lists. So much so that when I hear some newer pop(ish) songs in passing or in a store I am immediately teleported to a mental run or bike ride. In fact, there are some songs now I only equate to training. In addition I find myself listening to songs and thinking "This has a good cadence to it, I could run to it." And so I do.
Music nearly by definition evokes memories. Some of those memories evoke misery. But sorting them out is the difficult part. So I get upset when I heard "Again" by Janet Jackson? No, I laugh though. I laugh because at that time of my life those friends I had, I thought were life long. Forever. Reality is, they weren't, and that's ok. They were momentary. I laugh because much like other choices in both friends and music I've made; not all last. What does last is the memories. And the memories don't have to define me, they don't have to make me miserable. If anything now, the music only motivates me.

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